In the continued process of simplifying my life, I have recently started to opt out of many of the email updates I receive from favourite websites and newsletters. There is one, however, that I just can’t divorce myself from and that is The Daily Groove by Scott Noelle, a fellow parent who lives in Portland, Ore., and a source of encouragement to both me personally and my work with Simplicity Parenting.

Noelle sends out daily inspirations that speak to the often-challenging path of parenting and offers a different way to look at situations, emotions and behaviours that lead to a lot more peace and harmony in our family. You can find his insights at www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove and sign up to receive them too, if you choose.

The reason I share this — other than to spread the love — is because this week Noelle offered a “choosing ritual” that provided a practical application to something I try to remember when things get challenging in our house. I would recommend looking it up.

On our fridge I have a quote by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe that begins with “I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather…” You can read the entire piece on my website, but suffice it to say that ultimately it is our choice in how we see things. Perception is something we actually have control over — though in the thick of it you may not agree.

This morning I was pulling out of a parking space at the dentist’s office. Now, this is a large parking lot with only a smattering of light standards. One of them was sneakily hiding in my blind spot and once I heard the horrific crunching sound I knew there was enough damage to warrant a claim. My initial reaction was anger, yet I had three little girls in the van and fortunately was conscious enough — the key to making this all work — to pause and take a deep breath.

Bodywork would be needed. Whether I became enraged, let a string of curse words fly, or kicked a tire, nothing was going to change that.

So I chose not to go there.

All of this can be applied to situations with your children when you are triggered, completely frustrated, and at the end of your rope. This may in fact be the literal definition of “mindful parenting.” Being present to your emotions is the source of determining the next few moments or how the rest of your day goes.

The Goethe verse ends with: “If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.”

If we can do our best to remember this when the crayons find their ways onto the walls, when a baseball flies through a window, or when your computer keyboard is covered in jam, it just means that there’s some cleaning or fixing to do. That’s it, that’s all.

And you may just save yourself a few grey hairs.

The buzz around town these days is all about summer camps and recreational programs for kids. Summer is just around the corner and the anxiety is actually palpable as I hear parents asking each other what they have their children registered in. Is it good? Have you done it before? Is there any space left? How much does it cost? And… “I can’t be alone with my kids all summer!”

We’ve all been there to some degree, a slight sense of desperation permeating everything we say and do when faced with a slate of days both unstructured and ostensibly unending. I used to be one of those moms. I can relate. It’s a sense of panic one can’t easily shake — but it can be done.

This year I can truthfully say I’m looking forward to the summer holidays. It will be days of easy mornings — despite the fact that my girls have yet to learn to sleep past 7 a.m., packed picnic lunches and extra snacks while meeting friends at beaches from Porteau Cove to Furry Creek to all the local lakes. We’ll make day trips when the weather is sunny and we have plans for building forts in the forest and hunting for toadstools and fairies when it’s soggy.

The key to a successful summer holiday is rhythm and mindful scheduling. Book-ending our busy-ness with slow, easy mornings, reliable family dinners and consistent bedtimes will make all the difference for our four- and six-year-old. For families with older children, or kids with a wide spread of ages, different planning is most certainly necessary but success is just as achievable.

This is exactly what I have kept in mind when planning Squamish’s next Simplicity Parenting workshop “A Simple Summer” (Saturday, June 9 from 9:30 a.m. to 3 p.m.). It’s about discovering how to simplify, and connecting your parenting style with your values. Moms and dads will learn to balance spontaneous adventures with reliable rhythm and at the same time enhance the loving connection within the family.

Most specifically it’s meant to keep everyone sane over the two months of having the kids around the house 24/7. Parents will walk away with a plan along with small yet transformative doable changes to weave into the family fabric, each individually tailored so they work for you.

Kim John Payne writes in Simplicity Parenting that balancing the frenetic energy of a busy morning with a calm afternoon is what is needed for very young families. Those with older children benefit from sandwiching two or three “up” days with a couple “down” days. It’s all about the balance.

When these principles are embraced, the sort of chatter we hear in the parking lot at drop-off or when connecting with other parents on the sports field can easily transform from dread into excitement and joy about the pending summer holidays. I’m looking forward to hearing more of you amazing parents say you can’t wait for school to be out with just as much enthusiasm as your kids!