I don’t often take my children shopping with me. There’s a multitude of reasons for this, not the least of which is the whining that ensues when either one of my girls finds something she wants me to buy and I say no. No matter how firmly I resist, the pestering inevitably follows us from the store, into the car, and often all the way home.

As a creative mom I’ve come up with a plethora of ways to say no to the simplest request. However, none work so well on my children as “I don’t have the money;” “it’s too expensive;” or “we can’t afford it.” It’s not something that, at 4 and 6, they are able to argue with much conviction. As it should be at this time in their life, they have no idea whether we can afford it or if there’s money in my wallet.

In fact, we probably could afford (insert random-crap-kids-often-want here) if I thought it was a valuable use of money. However, on more than one occasion I have heard myself resort to a “position of lack” when I could simply be owning what is ultimately my choice.

As children grow up they are forming their “story.” It’s the story of their life — the one they repeat, either aloud or silently, for the rest of their years. Their story will decide their direction, shape how they interact with people, and sway the choices they make. It will become the tightly woven fabric of their subconscious. It may be the determining factor in their happiness.

Children naturally live in the abundant “now.” They come into our lives being complete, only looking to have their basic needs for love, food and shelter provided. It is adults who worry about finances, messy houses, being on time and whether there is a balanced meal on the table.

Kids are happy to make do. They are just as pleased to play in the dirt as they are on an upswept floor — and while I’m not suggesting we throw in the towel entirely on keeping a clean house, serving healthy food or paying your bills, I am suggesting we recognize the importance of how such things play in our relationships with our children.

It doesn’t matter if you have a lot of money or are barely getting by on assistance and help from the food bank. There are two ways to look at a situation — either from a place of lack or, more preferably, a place of abundance.

If we raise children to always know that the glass is half full, they grow into adults who have a sense of richness, stability and strength. If we teach them that the very same glass is half empty, there will be instilled a feeling of longing and never having enough. In both situations the glass is no different, simply our perspective. But the outcome is poles apart.

Four years ago we got rid of our television. Frankly, this has been a bit hard for some people, like my husband’s uncle who just this week tried to give (read: force) us to take an old tube TV that was being replaced in favour of an HD flat-screen model at their summer home.

Initially the idea was mine, but now both my husband and I embrace not having a TV; he’s come to look forward to going out to watch the important games and I have stopped watching hours of mindless home decorating shows when I could be more productive. For him it’s a great excuse to get together with buddies and drink beer on game night, guilt-free (what can I say, I got rid of our TV!). He’s also found out that live-streaming on my 26-inch computer is a reasonable substitute, and has always been nostalgically fond of old-school radio play-by-plays. Not having cable also saves us a monthly bill. Win-win, I say!

This week (April 30 to May 6) is Screen-Free Week, an annual event where people are encouraged to “turn off screens and turn on life,” according to the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood website which first spearheaded the movement in 1996. CCFC also suggests that children spend an astonishing average of 32 hours a week for preschoolers and even more for older children in front of screens. This includes TV, video games, computers, smart phones and other hand-held devices.’

Most would agree excessive screen time is harmful for our children, leading to poor performance in school, childhood obesity, and attention problems. For years France has been on the leading edge of the science behind screens and children, and in the past couple years even the Pediatric Association of the U.S. has determined that there is no acceptable amount of screen time for children under the age of 2. Remember all those lawsuits against the creators of Baby Einstein?

Regardless of whether kids are consuming “good” or “bad” programming, screens are the delivery method of choice for marketers who recognize that media dominates the lives of many kids. Brand recognition begins before kids have even entered preschool — it’s what marketers call “consumers for life.” Licensed brands and lines of clothing and accessories are only one example of this. The fact that kids will beg mercilessly for something with a favourite character on it is only one way big companies are getting control of your hard-earned dollars.

The idea behind Screen-Free Week is something our family has embraced, particularly when it comes to our children, and it’s been an incredible springboard for quality lifestyle changes and choices ever since. Kim John Payne, co-author of Simplicity Parenting, makes the point: “You can give your child a little bit of poison, or a lot. The choice is yours. But it’s still poison.”

That 26-inch iMac we have comes in handy for things other than work and the odd hockey game — we grown-ups still take a swig from the “bottle” with the big skull and crossbones on it from time to time. We like our movies, documentaries and are faithful to a couple of series on HBO. But that all takes place under the cloak of darkness, when the kids are fast asleep.